Two Things I Really Hate

Okay, so here are two things I really hate:

Let me set the scene for you. You've just gotten out of school or extracurricular project or something, and you're sitting on a bench, waiting for a significant other, friend and/or co-worker to pick you up. Someone that you know drives by after picking up another person who was involved in school or extracurricular project. They stop by, commenting on your new look or asking a quick question (i.e. "Did you get your school or extracurricular project finished?"), you answer, then they ask the question. I mean, it's not like it's obvious or anything. The stupidest 8 word question that has ever been asked. "Is someone coming to give you a ride?" I mean, whenever it happens to me, I want to answer "No... no... I just love sitting on benches until someone notices I'm gone and comes looking for me." I mean, it shouldn't make me so mad... but it does.

Another thing is something that I dread. I don't want to go into social situations because of it. Small talk. It's so... worthless. I mean, most people are like:

Tim: Hey John, nice to see you.
John: You too...
*awkward silence*
Tim: How about the weather?
John: Yeah! It's supposed to get over 100 degrees tomorrow.
Tim: That's hotter than your daughter!
John: ...
Tim: Um... I've got to go.

Great example of small talk. If it were up to me, it'd be:

Me: Hey! You know who's awesome?
Them: Peggy Sue
Me: Yeah... bye
Them: Bye!

See... no worthless opinions exchanged there... just cold hard facts. It starts quickly and ends quickly and there are no awkward silences or stupid things said. If you ever start small talk with me, you'll know that I hate it. I mean, for me it's like getting hit by a car. It's just like, I know where I'm going, then all of a sudden out of nowhere, "ASHLEY! HEY!" I've been hit! So what do I do now. "Hey Bob... what's cracken?" "Oh you know... not much, you?" "Um... not... not much." THIS IS CRITICAL NOW. It's at this point in the small talk where I shift my weight over to one leg and start looking over your shoulder at what I have to do. Sometimes, I walk away mid-sentence depending on what it is I have to do. You'll also notice that I bring up the task at hand a lot, like: "Oh yeah... I'm doing good... you know... just on my way to the Ice Cream Man. You know... Infact, yesterday I went to the Ice Cream Man and I got this great fudge bar. From the Ice Cream Man." If you don't get it by now, I'm just going to end our conversation. These are the usual things I say:

-Will you call me later? (This usually makes them happy, and say "Okay" and forget what they were talking about.)
-Oh... my dad's here (as much as I would love to stay and listen to you chat for hours about the weather.)
-Um... I've actually got to go. (this is straight and to the point. It gets the job done.)

Anyway, thanks for reading this...

Have a nice day.